Issue 48.10
Trying to be the perfect or ideal family is difficult, but especially so when you are a blended or stepfamily. I did manage to get three eagle scouts out of four sons, which is another interesting story. I think the badges that we diligent mothers sew on bandelos for our sons’ scout uniforms should come with trophies for the mom’s work behind the scenes -cajoling, nagging and reminding her dear sons and trying to motivate them to meet all the deadlines, complete the merit badges, plus go to meetings and campouts whether or not they want to. Then seeing them through the completion of their eagle project, we mothers are the ones who deserve a medal for endurance and patience.
Two of my older sons easily accomplished the requirements for their Eagle Scout award and completed their projects. Then it was time for my third teenager to do likewise, but he lost interest and couldn’t for the life of him complete his “personal management” merit badge despite my constant encouragement. Finishing his eagle project, that last badge was all that stopped him from becoming an Eagle Scout and me becoming the “Scout Mother of the Year.” Finally, when this son dropped out of high school, I realized that his Eagle Scout award wasn’t going to happen despite my best efforts. So I let it go.
I’m one of those who realizes that not everyone can have a “perfect family” with children who ALL go on missions, marry and not divorce, graduate from college, and live happily forever after. That’s another fairy tale. Life was teaching me that. Two of my sons did go on missions, three became eagle scouts, all four married, three of them divorced, and all graduated from college. So guess I could call myself a successful parent just to have “survived” it all. I will be 103 when I finally see my 50th wedding anniversary!
When dating time came for my sons, I hoped they would choose wisely. But times were changing, three of my sons would find themselves going through a divorce. Not anything I ever would have wished on them, but luckily they had no dependent children to care for. Life seems to be a cycle and the lessons we don’t want our children to learn the hard way seem to be the only way for them to gain the needed wisdom. Contact lin@sunrivertoday.com or call 628-8522 to purchase a bound copy of these columns for the past two years for $10.