Issue 33.15
An article recently published on-line in The New York Times by Katharine Q. Seelye caught my attention. Entitled “Obituaries Shed Euphemisms to Chronicle Toll of Heroin,” this feature focuses on the growing trend of writing obituaries in a candid manner. The article specifically deals with death as a result of addiction to heroin and the pain of the surviving family members left behind. Many of these survivors are choosing to forgo euphemisms as they pen their loved one’s obituary, resulting in a new and growing cultural shift – the publication of obituaries that are open and honest concerning the cause of death.
A euphemism is “a mild or indirect word or expression substituted for one considered to be too harsh or blunt when referring to something unpleasant or embarrassing.” Oftentimes, if a person has died in a harsh manner, i.e., an overdose, the cause of death is not mentioned in the obituary. Ms. Seelye’s article notes that “when celebrities like the actor Philip Seymour Hoffman die of heroin overdoses, the cause of death is a prominent part of the obituary. The less famous tend to die “unexpectedly” or “at home.”
I took a moment to read Mr. Hoffman’s obituary on-line, and yes, it was incredibly candid. Ms. Seelye states that “a growing number of families are dropping the euphemisms and writing the gut-wrenching truth, producing obituaries that speak unflinchingly, with surprising candor and urgency, about the realities of addiction.” This is generally done in an attempt to shed light on the problem of addiction and to encourage those within its clutches to seek help.
As a funeral director, I encourage family members to write an obituary they are comfortable displaying to the public. Some families are extremely private and do not want to call attention to their loved one’s struggles. I believe the deceased’s wishes should also come into play. If they were a private person in life, their obituary should reflect that attribute. If they were open and direct, perhaps they would want the cause of death to be addressed in an attempt to help others.
At Serenity Funeral Home, we offer a free obituary writing guideline and welcome your questions on the matter. We are located just off Riverside Dr. at 1316 S. 400 E., Ste. A5, St. George, or call us at (435) 986-9100. Visit us on-line at www.SerenityStG.com.
W. Russell Atkin, is Owner/Funeral Director, at Serenity Funeral Home of Southern Utah. www.SerenityStG.com