Issue 40.13
The story is told of a man who went to see his doctor and complained that his wife was not hearing him very well at all. “Whenever I ask her a question, she never answers me!” The wise doctor gave him the following advice: “Go home and do the following test. When your wife isn’t facing you, stand about 20 feet from her and ask her a question. If she doesn’t answer, move 10 feet and ask the same question. If she doesn’t answer again, move 5 feet. If she still doesn’t answer, move right next to her and ask it one last time to see if she finally hears you. Then you can point out her hearing loss.” The man thought this was a great idea, and went home immediately to give it a try. As directed by his doctor, he stood 20 feet away from his wife who was in the kitchen preparing dinner and not looking at him. “What’s for dinner?” he asked. After no response from his wife, he repeated the question at each of the closer distances as his doctor prescribed. Finally, when he was right next to her, his wife turned to him and in exasperation exclaimed “Honey, for the fourth time, WE ARE HAVING FISH TACOS FOR DINNER!!! How many times do I have to repeat myself!” The man finally realized that the doctor gave him the perfect test to demonstrate who really had the hearing loss in the family!
Here is some excellent advice and practical tips for those who suspect that their loved one has a hearing impairment. It comes from a website called www.betterhearing.org:
“If a loved one with a hearing loss has come to rely on your good hearing, what is the great need for them to wear hearing aids? Your co-dependent efforts must stop in order for them to grasp the magnitude of their problem. Many people with a hearing loss never realize how much communication they actually fail to understand or miss completely because you have become their ears. It takes only a short time for them to realize that without your help, they’re in trouble. It is through this realization that one becomes inspired to take positive action to solve their problem. Therefore, as a loving spouse or family member you must create the need for your loved one to seek treatment by no longer repeating messages and being their ears. Your ultimate goal is for them to hear independent of you.
* Stop repeating yourself! Explain that you are on a “Hearing Help Quest”—one that involves your loved one by allowing him or her the opportunity to realize the significance of their hearing loss. Do not stop helping though. Preface what you repeat by saying each time, “Hearing Help!” or some other identifier. In a short amount of time, your loved ones will realize how often you say this. In turn, they will come to realize how often they depend on you. (This suggestion is only for a loved one who resists the idea of getting any help).
* Stop raising your voice.
* Stop being the messenger by carrying the communication load for the family.
* Do not engage in conversation from another room.
* Do not act as their phone communication intermediary.
Most importantly, have them be seen by an Audiologist! Dr. Devin Anderson, Au.D. is located at Advanced Hearing and Balance Specialists. Dr. Anderson can be reached at 435-688-8866 at the Coral Desert Health Center located at 1490 E. Foremaster Dr. #360, St. George, UT between the hours of 9 AM – 5 PM Monday – Friday.